Are You Trying Too Hard To Find Love?

Believe it or not, love will find you. I know that sounds silly or even impossible. This is especially true when you want nothing more than to be in love. Your purpose in life seems to be finding someone that you can care about and that will care about you. But some people really do try too hard.

An example of this is always being on the go and on the lookout for someone to love. There are many people that go out to bars and other places regularly for the single purpose of meeting someone. And when they do ‘meet’ someone they may tend to scare that person off because of their aggressive approach to developing a relationship.

Does that sound like you? If so, here are some tips that might help you in finding someone and in developing a real relationship with them.

One of the first things I am going to say is, focus on yourself – not on finding a partner. Start by addressing your own needs. This may be something as simple as improving your manners or as complex as addressing an anger management issue. Other common concerns can be less than ideal hygiene or even dressing inappropriately. So take a hard look at yourself and make a goal to tackle one issue at a time. Trust me, everyone can benefit from self-improvement. And there are lots of books and websites dedicated to this topic.

As you notice the self improvements you make in your personality, looks, etc., your confidence and self-esteem will receive a huge boost. And this will come through – others will notice.

The next thing you should work on is getting involved in activities that truly interest you. Instead of spending money and time going to bars or other places in the hope of meeting someone – why not spend that effort on something you really enjoy. This might be joining a class of some sort or simply rediscovering a lost hobby. The point is that you should really ‘do’ things that you enjoy. And in the process you are likely to meet someone that is also interested in the same hobby or activity. Maybe you like rock climbing. If so, wouldn’t it be fun to have a partner that enjoyed that too?

If you are religious then joining a church may be for you. Many people consider their ‘church family’ to be vitally important in their lives. And church is a great place to meet people.

Ironically, most people find that when they stop ‘trying so hard’ to meet other people for the purpose of a relationship, that somehow it just happens. There really isn’t any magic involved – it’s simply based on putting yourself first. The truth is that loving yourself has to happen before you can love anyone else like you should. The self love makes you a better person with more to offer.

About Author
Alex Wise is blog contributor and dating consultant of - the fast-growing online dating site serving in New York and the surrounding areas BronxBrooklynManhattanQueensStaten Island and etc. He has been covering online dating, relationships, online and marriage niche since 2008. He loves sharing meaningful content that educates and inspires people to bring their dreams into reality

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